Monday, June 14, 2010


This week has been pretty crazy. We had plans to go to San Diego with the kids for Ryans weekend, which was Thurs/fri. I dont even remember Monday or Tuesday, but Wednesday evening Ryan started to complain of some lower back pain. By that night he was curled up unable to move. I have NEVER seen Ryan react to pain this way. I made him take some vicodin and ibuprofen and he was able to sleep. He went to work the next day only to have the same thing happen. I pretty much forced him to go to the ER after work, where they just gave him some drugs and sent him home...after 5 hours. I pretty much thought the SD trip was cancelled since he didn't get home til 10:30, but he insisted we still go! So carried the sleeping kids from their beds to their carseats, threw some stuff in the trunk and we were on our way! We made pretty good time and soon we walked into our hotel room, only to find they had given us ONE queen sized bed. HAHA! I went back down and asked for another room and the man was so incredibly rude and told me he didn't have ANY other rooms and even if we didn't end up staying they had a cancellation fee. I went upstairs and Ryan went down and when he came back up we had another room. Imagine that. What a jerk though....we're a family of FIVE! Come on man! So we got to bed around 2:00-2:30ish and of course Ezra was up by like 6:00am :)

We all got up and got showered packed up our things and set out for breakfast. After a smoothie and bagels we went to the aquarium! The kids had sooo much fun! They especially loved "Nemo" and Amelia insisted that he said hi to her. They had a whole display of Sea Horses that was so amazing! They also really liked the case of jelly fish. We spent about two hours walking through everything and then we drove to a huge outdoor mall in the Gaslamp district of San Diego. Ryan and I know our way around pretty well now, since this is one of our favorite date places.
We started at the top floor of the five floor building and ate tacos while Amelia threw chips to the birds, trying to catch them.
Then we went to the Elevator and went to 1st floor where Amelia found a candy store and got to walk through with a little bag picking out whatever she wanted. Ezra slept in the stroller almost the whole time :) then we walked through some kids clothes stores and got a few little cute things. After walking around for 2 or 3 hours we got back into the car and drove to Laguna to go to the beach. Its such an awesome drive and there are some of the most beautiful beach houses. We found an amazing little cupcake store on the way and by this time Amelia was asleep and Ezra was awake. So we went inside and bought 3 little cupcakes and shared them. It took a while to find a beach we liked, but we finally did. The beach was so nice and the kids had a blast! They refused to go in the water but they did let it touch their feet a little. They dug in the sand and built a sand castle with daddy and we even got to see dolphins! I was so overly excited about that! Finally the tide started to come in and it was getting chilly so we packed up and left. It was such a fun day and Im so glad Ryan was able to take us. Hes still suffereing from whatever is wrong with his back, I need to make him appointments with specialists today :( I feel so so bad for him. Anyway, another day at a time.


Um, well the main thing this week... Was my tooth ache. And ear ache. Like every day. I think I'd rather go through labor pains. I finally got into the Doctors and am on anti-biotics and some funky spray. Getting a little better. Not so excited about getting another tooth pulled tomorrow but at least it wont be able to hurt me anymore.

Jake came over on Monday. That was just as fun as usual. Maybe even better. He's finally moved on from the "Cars" movie to "Toy story 2" So we got to watch that 3 times. He's very excited about toy story 3 and told me he's going to watch it in 3D!

He's going to start spending the night soon and I'm very excited about that. I cant wait to have him a couple days a week. I hate being alone all the time while Ryan's at work.

I'm really thinking about going to school for cosmetology. I almost don't want to because I feel like I'm giving in when it's not what I really want. But since I don't have to much of a chance right to now of getting what I really want.... What else am I gonna do?

It's so hard for me. I don't really have any friend's left who don't have kids or aren't pregnant! And I feel like I want it more than any one. And I'm the only one not getting it. I try to enjoy my friend's children and be happy for them. But it's hard. It seems like every day I have to deal with some thing new. I'm almost 23 and I'm not anywhere close to where I wanted to be by this age. I'm so tired of feeling left out.

I also hate feeling unappreciated. By my family.... I feel like I have tried my hardest to help my family in every way possible this last year. From when my mom was in California.... To Christmas. Naomi's Wedding! I did everything I could to help. Physically, emotionally, financially... And I don't feel like any of it matters. And it hurts. But Ive been so scared to say anything because I don't want to hurt anyone else' feelings.

And... By Ryan. I try so hard to do everything around here. And work. And not get sick. And take care of him. But does any of it matter? There's always something else. Always something dirty. Something I didn't do. I just feel like I'm never good enough.

Well that's enough of a pity party for now. Don't mind me. Just a bad week.

I thought my knew life and complete change in schedule was going to be hard to get used to, but really its not…at all. We get up at 5am, which sounds awful but its really not considering we go to be at 9 or 10 every night. I was never a real morning person until now. Jesse leaves at ten after 5 to go to physical training for a couple hours and I stay home, clean up, wake up a little, make breakfast and coffee if Im feeling good and get a really good start to my day.

I love my life, my husband and my new home! Especially my husband, he was outside working on the yard on Wednesday and I was inside bored. I am usually outside either helping him or trying to get a tan but sometimes it is just WAY to hot. I’m from Michigan, warm weather confuses me. He came in for a drink, noticed I was bored and handed me a shiny blue card with my new name on it and sent me out for some shopping. Yes, I have the best husband ever. After three hours, my arms were getting tired of lugging around 6 full bags of new clothes, shoes, make-up and accessories, so I decided to call it a day, a very very good day.

The weekend rolled around and we decided to take a mini vacation, we packed up and left Saturday morning for Florida! We got to our beautiful hotel with an amazing view of the ocean at around noon, got into our bathing suits and spent the day on the beach. We bought floaties and he picked up some goggles so he could try to catch fish or crabs or something…I know he’s kind of socially retarded and weird, but he’s my husband so please just be nice to him. I laid on my floating bed while he pulled me around the ocean, searching for sea creatures to capture. After a few hours we went back into our room, showered and got ready for a night on the town We rented a HILARIOUS little scooter type vehicle and cruised the gorgeous streets along the beach. We found an amazing outlet mall, ate smoothies, and walked around the shops for hours. It was so far, my best memory of my married life. And last but not least, we of course had to try and be romantic and walk the shore line at night. My favorite part of our mini vacation is when he mention that we should do it again soon!! Whoohoo!
I have everything iv ever wanted; a wonderful husband, a beautiful home, fresh pineapple in the fridge and a Jacuzzi bath tub.

1 comment:

  1. And here is what I take away from this entry:

    “I am usually outside either helping him or trying to get a tan but sometimes it is just WAY to hot.” You are the most ridiculous person I know. This sentence is so retarded, yet so amazing.

    “We bought floaties and he picked up some goggles so he could try to catch fish or crabs or something…I know he’s kind of socially retarded and weird, but he’s my husband so please just be nice to him. I laid on my floating bed while he pulled me around the ocean, searching for sea creatures to capture.”
    I wish you could see my facial expression at this's somewhere between laughing my ass off, rolling on the ground, and just shrugging in a WFT manner. I want this quote on a t shirt. Make it happen.

    “We rented a HILARIOUS little scooter type vehicle…It was so far, my best memory of my married life.” I don't even know where to begin. I could make a joke, but it would pale in comparison.

    Long story short, I love the shit out of you.